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A POST ABOUT A TOAST

A POST ABOUT A TOAST

If there’s one thing I’m seeing happen way too often these days, it’s inappropriate toasts at weddings.  I used to be shocked when this would happen, but it’s happening so frequently these days that the shock is wearing off.  It’s become commonplace to me to see toasts given that make people completely uneasy, and in some cases must hinder friendships, at least temporarily.  The person giving the toast never realizes that it’s gone sour while it’s happening, and what’s worse is the uncomfortable look on most of the guest’s faces, especially the bride and groom.  Sometimes I wish i had a “Wrap-It-Up” button.   

Inappropriate can mean many things.  Of course there is the obvious, like the wedding I did where the grooms ex-turned-bride’s best friend droned on telling story after story about good times her and the groom spent together, never actually making a point or cleverly giving it a brilliant “best wishes” ending like everyone hoped she would.  It was the only time ever had to cut off someone’s mic during a toast.  I don’t think she and the bride were friends anymore after that, just my guess.  Okay, that’s a pretty extreme and rare example, but certainly one I had to share for the sake of entertainment.  There are also the less extreme examples of best friends getting up and telling stories of exes, or even parents of bride or groom droning on endlessly about how great their son/daughter is.  That’s nice, but it’s already made obvious by the fact they just got married.  You don’t need to convince us anymore.  Typically what I see is people who get up and off to a good start, but after a few minutes it becomes obvious that they have no plan or direction whatsoever and they’re winging it, badly.  I’m sure they have the best intentions, but good intent doesn’t make a good toast, and now your wasting the couple’s precious and expensive time.  With such easy access to information these days, there is just no excuse for that.  I’m going to cut this paragraph short because honestly I could go on endlessly about the stuff I’ve seen go wrong. 

So let’s get down to some solutions:

Keep it short, sweet, and to the point.  The average attention span of people these days gives you about 2 minutes before they start getting bored.  So that’s not to say your toast has to be 2 minutes, but you’d better convince them in those 2 minutes, no, in that first minute, that the rest of your toast is going to be worth paying attention to. 

Google search some information and even some videos on giving toasts.  About half of the toasts I see these days start with “I’ve never had to give a toast before so I Google searched some tips”.  And those usually end up being good ones. 

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